Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Bump Update: Week 16

It is about to get real.  Just a forewarning.  :)

About mid-way through my time at college, I felt that God was leading me in a different direction than what I had set out.  At the time, I was aiming to be a missionary.  My goal was to spend the rest of my life in Africa caring for orphans.  But God had other plans for me.  The ministry classes and chapels that I was sitting through were teaching me things, re-prioritizing my life.  In the midst of it all, and after spending time with a full-time missionary to Kenya, I learned that a dream can be Godly without being a part of God's plan.  So I started praying.  If God didn't intend for me to be a missionary, then what did He want from me?

I don't know how I ended up with the answer.  There wasn't an audible voice, no divine moment while I was reading my Bible, not even a light bulb moment during chapel.  At some point along the way I just knew that God wanted me to be a stay at home mom.  While I was learning and diving into Scripture, it occurred to me that maybe that was how God intended it to be. I could go on here and tell you why I believe being a stay at home mom is essential to our faith and family but that isn't the point today.  The point is that the calling God has placed on my life, without a doubt, is for me to be a stay at home mom.  

Now is when things get real - our budget is tight.  And we are both working.  I'm not working full-time, but I'm working 28 hours a week.  Yes, we have enough to pay the bills and buy groceries, but that's about it.  $30-$50 to buy one pair of maternity pants?  (Why do they have to be so expensive? And why do my legs have to be so long?) That might cut into savings depending on how the month goes.

So how exactly am I supposed to stay at home once Sprout comes if we literally need my income?  The question haunts me.  And I struggle with it.  Some days I am confident that God will work it out.  After all, He placed this calling on my life for a reason.  But other days I look at the impossible and lose my faith.  It is a roller-coaster I am trying so hard to get off of.  On Sunday, I found myself at the altar praying for faith, for hope, for a reassurance - begging God to make the impossible possible.  While the voice was not really audible, there was a still small voice within me whispering, "God will make a way where there seems to be no way."  I haven't heard that song in ages.  I was instantly overwhelmed with His presence and started to cry.  Yeah - it doesn't even seem like the tiniest possibility right now.  And so many Christians tell me, "maybe God has a different plan."  But I know that He placed this calling on my life.  Why would He do that if He were just going to yank it away?  That isn't the God I know.  

So yesterday, I claimed His calling on my life in faith.  And I put my fears in His hands.  But I ask that you would pray with me, because I am constantly picking those fears back up.  Pray that I would find a peace about this and that my faith would not be shaken.  And please pray that God would open the right doors at the right times...and that I won't miss them.  

Okay, now for the fun stuff!  Bump update!  

This week, baby is the size of an: Avocado.  I love avocados.  :) 

Next appointment: Tomorrow!  Hoping Hubby will finally get to hear Sprout's heartbeat.  Since there are 4 doctors at our practice, Hubby is coming until he meets them all...then he will only come when it is necessary.  But I do love having him with me!

Total Weight Gain/Loss: Pretty much remaining steady at about 9 pounds less than pre-pregnancy.  So a pound less than last week.  But I haven't been fluctuating as much either.  I'm eating better...guess Sprout is just taking all of it.  Anxious to see if the doc will say anything tomorrow.  :/

Exercise: The weather hasn't been cooperating as much, but I've been doing more around the house.  I still need to incorporate ab, back, and leg routines to aid in delivery.  Every once in awhile I try to do squats when I'm rocking my little one at work.  ;)

Maternity Clothes: Nope.  Got the shorts I ordered and they are too small already.  Even though they said they would fit a waist size 3 inches bigger than mine.  Going to try and contact Zulily today.

Sleep: Great this week!  

Food Cravings/Aversions: Anything with a strong smell is tough these days.  Made BBQ pork in the crock pot the other day - as soon as I walked in the door I was nauseous.  Needless to say, I ate something else for dinner that day. 

Movement: I hate answering this question with a no.  Feels like it is going to take forever.  :P

What I Miss: My brain.  No joke.  I'm even more forgetful than I was.  And I get overwhelmed so easily.  I left my wallet on top of the car after getting gas on Monday. Somehow, it stayed there after an hours drive to Pittsburgh.  Unreal.

What I'm Loving: I feel beautiful.  There isn't any worrying about what I look like or if certain pants make my love handles stick out.  I'm supposed to have a growing mid-section!  

What I'm Looking Forward To: We get to schedule our next ultrasound tomorrow.  And that means we are that much closer to finding out if Sprout is a girl or a boy!  :D

Best Moment This Week: I got to see the 4 kiddos I nannied in Pittsburgh on Monday and told them our exciting news!   They all reacted so differently but I loved every moment.  The oldest (a boy mind you) was genuinely excited.  He had asked me before we moved if they would get to meet our baby if we had one.  Now he can't believe it is happening so soon.  One of the twins kept poking my belly, "There's really a baby in there?"  And they all had input as to what the name should be.  Super fun.

Milestones: Sprout can hear!  That's so weird to me.  I've been reading about how the same song sung throughout pregnancy can be soothing to a new born.  Sprout is going to love Twinkle, Twinkle because that is the only song I sing when I'm rocking my little one at work to sleep.  I really should change it up.  lol.

Goals: Baby related?  Not much this week, except to eat more.  House related?  Sand the bathroom floor so that Hubby can seal it next weekend.  

Now for pics!  Hubby doesn't tell me when he is taking the pic - he just starts pushing the button repeatedly while I'm talking and what not.  This makes for a bunch of not so great pics.  lol. But at least we're getting some.



And last but not least, a picture from the front as I was pulling my shirt back down and going to take the phone away from Hubby. But you can at least see that precious little bump!  :) 


4 comments:

  1. I think I'm gaining all your weight... well maybe not quite all of it - yet.. but my doctor is going to give me an earful at my next appt... I am dreading it! Seems like my constant nausea is only settled by grazing... and then I'm nauseated by GOOD things and can only eat garbage processed foods (like pretzels, rice cakes, etc) which I normally wouldn't eat. Hoping this phase passes soon. BUT... enough about me.

    I can understand your worries, being a SAHM myself. Will you continue with your home business? Having a wee one definitely takes up almost all of your time - but I'm not sure the demands of a home business... and I only was able to sew/sell baby shoes once E started taking 2-3 hour naps in the afternoons! I don't do much sewing these days having the two running around. Perhaps you'll be able to continue to keep a little income coming in. But ultimately, if not.... you have lots of family who love you and will help you. Plus, you know you'll get LOTS of baby stuff at your baby shower! And if gift cards start to trickle in early... I don't think there is anything wrong with using them for maternity clothes. Walmart's website has maternity for relatively cheap compared to others I've seen. It also might not hurt to try Goodwill. Katy found me a maternity skirt once and it's been great! I will keep you in my prayers though - I know it can be easy to let the worry creep in. (You could also try online yard sale sites on FB to search for people selling maternity clothes at a decent price!) Good Luck!

    PS--you might want to give people your baby registry info now (even if you aren't done adding things... I know I added things up to the end!)... so people can start getting you things (presumably your moms who are probably beyond excited!) it might lift a little of the burden from your shoulders if you know certain things have been purchased and you can spend a little extra on clothes for yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Brianna ShermanMay 1, 2014 at 6:04 AM

    I'm afraid I'm going to get an earful for not gaining weight. lol. Wish there was a way we could share. ;) I'm not able to eat a lot of junk or meat - which is probably part of my problem. I'll be praying that your body starts feeling better soon so you can get back to normal eating habits!

    For now I will keep up with the business, which by then may be making me a decent amount since it's adding a little now. But I'm just afraid I won't be able to keep up. Hoping to find something else along the lines of data entry or something - but those jobs are few and far between.

    The Goodwill in Indiana - which is where we work, has a tiny section. That is where I discovered that the average maternity pants are not going to be long enough. haha. But maxi dresses will work and I can get those pretty cheap. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Amber Marie TebeauMay 1, 2014 at 11:41 PM

    When you're a stay at home mom it comes with other stressors but you can make it through. There are tighter budgets, and constant balancing acts yet you get used to it. There are a lot of benefits to staying home with your child, and really anyone that is able to stay home is a rock star. I don't down working mothers, they as just as good at their job too. I just want you to know that you will make it through, sometimes I run on hopes and dreams with a little bit of creativity.

    Also, your kid will tend to sleep on your schedule after birth. My son would wake up at the intervals I woke up before he was born. So it wasn't that hard on me. I hope your baby is a healthy one!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Brianna ShermanMay 2, 2014 at 6:44 AM

    Creativity is key! :) We're starting to get creative now so we can do so later. Just anxious to see this little one! Thanks!

    ReplyDelete

Please let me know what you thought of this post! I love getting feedback from my readers and I always do my best to reply! :)